We meditate because we have many desires.
Desire is wanting something we do not have. Desire involves trying to be something we are not. Desire means that we are not complete. It means that we feel somehow flawed. Having many desires means that our fundamental outlook is one of poverty. Our fundamental philosophy is one of impoverishment and struggle, thus we are always trying to further enrich ourselves. We do not know contentment. We meditate so that we can discover a fundamentally different perspective and change the pattern of our dissatisfaction.
Practically speaking, the problem with desire is twofold. If we do not get what we want, we immediately experience unhappiness. If we do get what we want, our satisfaction does not last, but instead only leads to further complications and loss.
When we are unable to fulfill some desire we feel irritation, anger or resentment and these are painful feelings. Desire itself, if it is very intense, can be painful. These painful feelings quickly multiply into even more desires as we seek ways to eliminate our unhappiness. Thus, even when we do not get what we want, desire only leads to even more desire. Our feeling of dissatisfaction leads to further impoverishment.
On the other hand, if we do get what we want, it quickly leads to emotional complications and loss. Our satisfaction does not stay. We always hope that by obtaining something we will find peace and happiness. We expect to feel satisfied. This feeling of satisfaction is quickly replaced with new desire. Why? One simple reason is because desire is a habit. And desire is wanting something we do not have. So things we do have can bring us no satisfaction. It is a vicious circle. Another, more fundamental reason why we can never stay satisfied, is because of the law of impermanence.
In order to understand why desires lead to suffering, we have to understand impermanence. If we do not understand impermanence we will be susceptible to some fantastical ideas, such as a possibility of some heaven-like states of permanent bliss. Heaven is meant to be some place where we always get what we want and the circumstances and our enjoyment of them never change. It is meant to be the place where our desires do not lead to suffering and where there are no emotional complications. We believe in this idea as something real, as something possible, because we do not understand impermanence. But heaven does not have to be some otherworldly realm – in fact people search for heaven all the time. We seek it in our relationships and in material possessions. We seek permanent happiness in conditioned, impermanent things. This is foolish. For example, we spend a lot of energy designing our homes in order to feel happy. Or perhaps we may look for new romantic relationships.
In trying to understand impermanence, we may ponder some long term changes in the world around us. For example, the weather and the seasons are always changing. We can see that this is true and thus we think that we understand impermanence. And even though, impermanence does affect all objects of conditioned phenomena, the most striking aspect of impermanence is that our minds are continuously changing. The mind changes very quickly – it never stays the same. This is why desire always leads to complications. Even our ideas of heaven, as some permanent place of joy and happiness, cannot be rational, if the mind itself is impermanent.
Once we have understood this, we will be more inclined to look inwardly as a way of finding peace. Being at peace is happiness. Having a peaceful mind and being contented is a fundamentally different outlook from the craving of desire. Our basic ground of impoverishment has been infused with abundance. Even if our contentment does not stay for long, due to impermanence, having shifted our basic outlook, it is not hard to find it again. Thus, we can relax because good things are actually fully available. We can be at ease. We can be at peace. We have replaced the cycle of despair with the cycle of contentment.
In order to accomplish this change, working directly with the mind is necessary. We have to practice mindfulness in order to recognize our own mental patterns. If we are only looking to improve outward circumstances of our lives, we will never find happiness. This statement is in stark opposition to modern materialistic philosophy. In essence we are replacing many desires with one desire – the desire to find peace.
With mindfulness practice we are learning about our habitual mental patterns. With meditation practice we are actively changing them and discovering how to actually be contented. Normally, we believe that we will be contented if we get what we want, but we have seen that this does not work. In order to be contented we will need wisdom. Proper meditation practice is designed to gradually develop wisdom. Meditation and mindfulness practice are the precise and scientific way of dealing with our desires. We are learning how to work with our restlessness. Therefore, if you feel disturbed by many desires, you should begin to meditate so that you can actually do something practical about them.
The second reason why we meditate is because we have many prejudices.
Prejudices always lead to suffering for they are one sided and blind.
We are extremely opinionated. Our opinions are nothing other than an expression of our confusion. Mind is always grasping and whatever we happen to take hold of, we take it as the truth. We believe in this truth that we have ‘grasped’. We are willing to defend it. If others don’t see it in the same way, we consider them foolish. What we do not understand, is that the minds of these ‘others’ are also only grasping. We are exactly alike. The differences are irrelevant, as the only difference is merely something our minds have temporarily taken hold of.
When our mind takes hold of some idea, which we deem precious, true or perhaps hard to understand, the mind tends to become proud, inflexible and rigid. When we let go of some idea, which we held onto for a long time, the mind tends to become more humble. Through meditation practice we develop humility and flexibility because in our stillness we are not allowing ourselves to become infatuated with ideas or experiences. We are not moved by the grasping quality of our minds.
In time, we can realize that the mind is always grasping at something. This is like saying that the wind is always blowing. If there is no blowing, there is no wind. In the same way, if there is no grasping, there is no mind. So how do we let go of this grasping quality of the mind?
This is what we are trying to practice in meditation. When we meditate, we are letting go of our conceptual ideas. We are allowing them to pass us by. It is not so much that the mind will stop grasping after objects, it is just that the grasping itself will become spacious rather then solid. Gradually, we can let go of our prejudices. Letting go of our prejudices is important. In fact, it seems to me, that letting go of our prejudices is paramount to the health of our human societies. Therefore, we should all meditate in order to develop a healthy and tolerant society.
The third reason why we meditate is because our confusion is endless.
We are confused by the universe around us as we are trying to find our place in it. We feel alone and overwhelmed by this feeling of separation. Our feelings and thoughts can also be a great source of confusion. We seek the certainty of beliefs in order to eliminate this confusion. We desperately need something that we can rely on. We want to find some guiding principle that can help us. The basic characteristic of this confusion is doubt. What we can’t recognize is that our worldly knowledge and our reliance on beliefs only serve to prolong and expand our bewilderment and anxiety.
Watch your mind. What do you see? You see thought followed by thought. Endlessly they march like a band of merry solders. As we always tend to identify with our thoughts, we are left at their mercy. We are under their spell. But whom do they serve? If they are really serving you, then why do you feel so lost?
A confused mind is a river of worries and fears and desires. And it is endless. You will never be able to exhaust it. The more we think, the more confused we become. Perplexity leads to even more doubts. In trying to eliminate these doubts, you can try to analyze things, but clear thinking is hard to find. At the best of times, our thinking is characterized by ignorance, but mostly it is motivated by fear. We imagine that we are rational, but instead we are only rationalizing.
Understanding and peace always seem just out of reach. Meditation is the radical discipline of quieting the pace of our thoughts. Here, in meditation practice, we are trying something different. We are trying to use the mind in a different way. We are not just following our bewilderment. You are not simply reacting to your thoughts. With meditation practice, for the first time in your life, you are also observing you mind without reaction. We are actually learning something about ourselves. We are slowly rising above the predictable pattern of our basic confusion of whom and what we are.
When we are swept away by the confused mind, it is the same as if a flood has swept away all in its path. Even right now, we are being carried away. Our constant need to be entertained and to be ‘plugged in’ is a characteristic of us being carried away. When we are being swept away like this, we are essentially asleep. We have surrendered our privilege of being awake, of being aware, of being alive. This is why we are confused – because we are sleepwalking.
If we can only realize that this cycle of uncertainty, doubts and fears is endless, we will also see that there is no end to our worries. We will see that there is no end to the various projects that we have begun, as these are mere distractions. All our projects and ambitions are just reactions of a worried mind. When you truly understand this, you will wish to abandon all such pointless activities. However, this is not easy, because the confused mind has a lot of momentum and is very attached to its habits. It takes discipline. It takes courage.
Again, you should know that this cycle of ignorance is endless. It will never exhaust itself by itself. It truly takes discipline, practice and patience. In time, with correct effort, we will snap the chain and discover peace and freedom. The best way to start on this path is by regular daily meditation practice. We develop peace by practicing peace. Eventually our confusion can be replaced by clarity. Clarity means lack of confusion, non-perplexity. The foundation of this clarity is a peaceful and generous mind that has let go of its fears.
Meditation is the way of discipline and courage. It is the way of observation and realization. With regular meditation practice, we are not just being swept away anymore. Even as we are floating on this ocean of confusion, we are watching it. Meditation is the practice of pacifying the mind in the midst of its confusion. So settle down and try to enjoy a moment of stillness and peace. Start small without any great ambition to become a great meditator. This is the beginning of the end of our confusion.
The fourth reason why we meditate is because we are all becoming more distracted.
Being distracted, it is almost as if we are not even alive. We meditate in order to be alive. Traditionally, it has been thought that the four requirements of life are: food for nourishment, clothes and shelter for protection from elements, medicines for when we are sick and meditation. We can understand the first three, but why meditation? How can meditation be a necessity of life?
Awareness has this wonderful quality of aliveness. We are being present right here. We are being present right now. No matter what may be happening, whether it is good or bad, awareness makes it taste better. Without awareness we lead bleak lives. Not being distracted gives us a possibility of being able to appreciate life we are living. Awareness leads to appreciation, and appreciation is necessary for the feelings of gratitude and happiness.
Distraction is counter productive to happiness and yet in our search for happiness we seem to seek ever greater and more continuous distraction. Why is this? The image that comes to mind is the image of Titanic, with music playing, people dancing and laughing, champagne flowing while the ship’s pilot is asleep at the wheel. Our restlessness and addiction to speed are symptoms of our anxiety and fear. We feel helpless, so why don’t we distract ourselves from the reality that is too scary to contemplate?
In order to undertake the discipline of meditation we must not be afraid of looking. If we can resist discouragement and passive despondency, practicing concentration within steady daily meditation regiment is a direct antidote to a distracted and restless mind.
Once we are aware, once we are alive, we can actually do something positive. We can empower ourselves to do whatever change we feel we need to implement in ourselves and in the world. This is meditation in action – the skillful means of bringing about a positive change in our society. Not being distracted we know what to do.
The fifth reason why we meditate is because we will get old.
This is inevitable. Once old, we will not be able to meditate. Our bodies will be too tired and too sick. If we do not realize wisdom now, when we have every opportunity to do so, once we are older it will be too late.
Once we are faced with sickness and old age, all that will be left will be our fears: fears of death, fears of sickness, and fears of loneliness. This is inevitable. At such a time, all of our high power tools and gadgets will be useless. Even our bodies will refuse to obey us.
Even though we all know this, we choose to ignore it. Because we ignore what we know, when faced with such circumstances, we respond in irrational ways. We develop religions. We make ourselves believe and call it faith. This is not faith – this is ignorance. This is hysteria born of fear. This is only wishful thinking. We hope that somebody will come and do all the work for us. By studying history we can clearly see that even though majority of population may believe in something, it does not make it true. You should not blindly follow something just because it is a commonly held belief. Popular beliefs are mere conventions and they continuously change.
So not only do we meditate, we meditate as if there is no time to lose. We meditate right now, because we never know when we will get sick. Also, we meditate even if we are the only ones meditating. We don’t do it because it is popular or not popular. So don’t waste your time. Don’t waste your life. If you have energy enough to read this – you have energy enough to meditate. It is still not too late.
The sixth reason why we meditate is because we need to know.
We want to know peace. We want to know freedom. We want to know the unknowable. How can we know these things?
For the past twenty five centuries, or even longer, philosophers have been unable to come up with a satisfactory definition of knowledge. What is knowledge? Even in this materialistic, science driven, fact finding age, we are unable to have a satisfactory and agreed upon definition. This is because conventional realities are always changing, but human yearning has somehow stayed the same. Knowledge has to do with intention, and our intention is to be free from suffering, anxiety, fear and violence. So what we consider to be the highest knowledge has to do something with these motivations.
Awareness is the experience of something. When we experience something and we are aware of that experience, we know. What we ordinarily consider knowledge, is actually not knowledge. We are equating information with knowledge and we seem to be obsessed with collecting and storing information. And even though our libraries are growing exponentially every year, it seems that we know less and less.
When you experience peace, this is knowledge worth having. When you are aware, this is knowledge worth pursuing.
When we are being ignorant, even though it seems that we are experiencing something, we are not. We may believe that we are learning something new, but we are only memorizing confusion. We live our lives with our eyes closed and the mind continues to retain its qualities of dullness and ignorance. Instead of developing wisdom, we are developing further states of confusion. This leads to nothing but uncertainty. Thus, ignorance is uncertainty, and uncertainty is painful. With meditation practice there is a possibility of experiencing something other then uncertainty. With insight we can overpower our doubts and experience something worth knowing. This is useful knowledge. This is wisdom.
We only want to increase our conventional knowledge of the physical world around us because we think it will help us feel and be safe. But it does not work. This kind of knowledge is not the knowledge of peace. When we know peace, we are at peace. To know peace, we must be at peace. Knowing how to fix your car or knowing how to generate atomic energy will not accomplish that.
We also want to know the unknowable, for unknowable is beautiful – and we want to know beauty. The limit of knowledge is also beautiful. There are things which can not be described within limitations of language for all words and concepts are mere conventions. To go beyond such limitations is our inspiration.
Ultimately, we can even let go of these beautiful things. Then, and only then do we experience freedom. I am not sure how this could be possible without meditation.
The seventh reason why we meditate is friendship.
Even though social media seems to allow us to be more present in each other lives, we are becoming more and more alienated. We are forgetting how to develop the basic human qualities of warmth and friendship. Friendships have become superficial.
Meditation practice is a group practice. Without a group, we are unable to develop the human qualities of friendship, compassion and generosity. The origin of the word loving-kindness, metta in Pali, is friendliness. It is not possible to develop friendship without other people around us.
But why meditation? How is meditation conductive to development of these basic human qualities? Partly, it is because meditation is not easy. On longer retreats we will struggle. The good thing is that we will not be alone in this struggle. Sitting beside us will be other members of a meditation group, wrestling with their practice. Together, sitting in stillness, we will be able to overcome whatever obstacles we may have been facing and this will aid us in developing the qualities of generosity and friendship.
When we see our friends engaging in meditation practice, this will give us great encouragement to continue. Thus, by sitting in groups, we tend to encourage each other. A group is a great support to our personal development. Also, it is true that sometimes we may irritate or be irritated by someone in our group. If this happens to be the case, a meditation group is the best place to examine our behavior as the environment of the group is meant to be suffused with the energy of mindfulness and generosity.
When we step into a meditation group we should be able to feel good-will toward all. Being able to generate these feelings should be based on the individual group members developing wisdom and understanding. It should not be some form of mutual intoxication and being carried away by ideas or customs. In meditation group we should be guided by clarity and compassion.
Thus, with mutual help we can overcome our prejudices, selfishness and irritation and each of us can grow as a person. In time, we can develop and discover true friendship. We may even realize that this friendship is also one of the prerequisites for happiness.
Therefore, we meditate because we wish all to be happy, free from worry and at peace.
Northern Lights Sangha 